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11.21.2007

Single and happy

Who says single has to mean sad? If you're sick of the associations, start holding your head up high - right now it's great to be single.

However, until relatively recently being single held a certain amount of stigma, and in some quarters it still does. Women who did not marry were dubbed spinsters, and were described as 'left-on-the-shelf' if they hadn't entered wedlock by their early twenties, implying that they were unwanted. You never hear of eligible spinsters, do you? Men fared slightly better as bachelors. This sounded like much more fun, and implied a carefree lifestyle, but even they were looked at as strange if they hadn't settled down by their mid thirties.

Successfully single
Today it's becoming more and more common for both sexes to wait longer before settling down, caused partly by wanting to play the field, and concentrating on a career over a relationship. This is more likely to be down to a conscious decision to be single, rather than an inability to find a partner. While your Gran may be pestering you on when you're going to settle down, if you're happy with your life then don't go changing.

Even if you are single because you've split up with your last partner, it doesn't mean that life has to be an ordeal. It hasn't suddenly transformed you into half a person, lacking something essential. Think of it as a wealth of new opportunities instead.

Making the most of singledom:

It's different for everyone. Try making a long list of all the things that make you happy, and make sure that you do at least some of them regularly.
Stay in touch with your friends, keep all your lines of communication open, and get out and about.

Don't rush into looking for someone new, most people can smell desperation a mile off, and it isn't attractive. (thesite.org)

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